Reflections of MeloD

    In the American ideal, home promises the warm embrace of family, the generosity of unconditional love and the nurturing availability of wisdom and support. But there is an altogether different kind of home on the dark side of the American dream. Today, in startling numbers, there exists an American domestic nightmare, an epidemic of family violence.
    For a staggering number of victims, home is the place where they are verbally and physically assaulted, bruised, cut, gravely injured, and killed - by abusers who claim to love them. By abusers who believe that this is a family matter and no body’s business but their own.
    Domestic Violence is a crime punishable by law. It affects 1 out of every 4 women you personally know! A change is long overdue! Understanding is in order! It is this reason, I give to you, The Domestic Violence Series. Created to educate. Created to help humanity understand.
    The Domestic Violence Series offers insight as to what it feels like to live through a violent relationship and to have survived! It is my hope that these paintings will show you how it feels to live in fear of someone who supposedly loves you. To feel unworthy and worthless. What it feels like to deny a truth so painful, to keep a secret with such desperation. To then come upon a time of awareness which in turn gives strength for emergence from this nightmare. To move and grow beyond a dysfunctional past. To do extensive introspecting and to search for the knowledge which will enable change. A change to zero tolerance. A change toward a new way of living. A change to an attitude of self respect . A change for a healthier relationship.
    I began this project as a personal endeavor for an organization which helped me through troubled times. Being the artist I am, I set out to transform a painful memory onto canvas. My intentions were to give this painting to the shelter as a means of raising funds. As I painted FEAR, I realized a sense of release. This release proved to be very therapeutic. A form of cleansing, if you will. I had the need to paint another. I did, I painted another. And another. I soon realized this visual diary of intimate thoughts, feelings and memories. This project quickly became a personal mission. With each painting I found myself looking at this sickness inside and out. I painstakingly transformed what I had felt. The darkness and helplessness which had once engulfed my soul. On to a period of enlightment and non enablement. Beyond denial and ignorance into truth. Countless sleepless nights and emotionally draining days were spent in my studio recapturing these memories. Yet, as painful as it was, I now smile. I smile, because I have survived and am overcoming! Individually, each painting symbolizes the continued struggle a victim endures. There are nine paintings in THE DOMESTIC VIOLENCE SERIES”.
    It is my hope that each person who views these paintings try to feel what the victim feels! Walk the victims path. As you continue to study these paintings open your mind. This issue affects YOU perhaps in a way you have yet to discover .
    Domestic violence is not always so easily detected. Both the victim and the abuser may not recognize it for what it is. At times, this violence lives within a family unit in very subtle ways. For instance, mind games and power plays are not as easily recognized. Even physical acts can be down played.
    Perhaps these paintings will encourage victims to reach for help; to realize there is always hope! These paintings may even encourage an abuser to ask for help. It is possible that he or she will feel their own spirit emerging out of the depths of despair into emotional wisdom and health. Maybe viewers will walk away from these paintings with greater understanding and empathy for survivors and their children! This series should evoke dialog. Domestic violence transcends generations and has a tremendous cost to society. I believe it takes more than the abuser to perpetuate the cycle. It takes enablement and acceptance from the victim as well. The victims role is just as dysfunctional. It takes educating ALL involved to reap the greatest improvements.

    The nakedness is not meant to offend the viewer. It is meant to represent the stripping and theft of the victims soul and essence of being. I personally feel experiencing this violence from the hands of one whom supposedly loves you is all too degrading. To express this feeling, I chose to portray the victim unclothed. Perhaps it could best be explained by stating that being abused makes a victim feel as belittled as one might feel walking into a crowded room of fully clothed people, totally naked! One’s dignity, self respect and self esteem become damaged and depleted. I expect controversy. With controversy comes change! The images are blunt and strong. But I will stand by my convictions and express to the viewer, whomever it may be, this is how abuse makes a person FEEL!
    Abuse is not partial to gender, race, age, economic, educational or social level. I pulled from personal experiences to create this series. I do not intend to express prejudice to any specific group.
    The cross shown in the paintings represents hope. Hope of a better tomorrow. Hope for survival. Hope for the children. Hope of healing. It does not represent any religious group nor any religious view. My intent is not to express religious beliefs.
    The ghost like faces and images represent the “ghost of the past” and “the evilness of this sickness”. They live on through generation after generation. This is “the cycle”. As victims, I believe our personal past are occupied by these ghosts. These ghosts become circumstances to blame for our inadequacies, parental leniencies, dysfunctional life and habits. We must remember focusing on the past robs the present of its joy and vitality.
    The roses have meaning as well. I learned to associate roses with emotional discord. Roses were used as an apology to me. Like a peace offering of sorts.
    I am thankful to have discovered a desire to reach for truth. It is what set me free. I have learned the importance of education of this epidemic. I know that I must continually look in the mirror if I want to break the cycle. Abuse is a learned behavior. It takes direct specific objectives to stop it. It takes time to break a cycle which is so embedded in the family structure.
    There is an urgent need to study the effects domestic violence has on children. There is a need to educate parents as well as psychologist, psychiatrist, counselors, case workers, mentors, law enforcement officers, lawyers and judges. The destruction that violence has on children in the home is devastating! It rears it’s ugly head throughout their development and growth. This will happen even if the children are removed from that environment at an early age. Children will mirror what they see. I have watched and kept notes as my own children have struggled to overcome their learned behaviors. I have studied their personalities, habits, behavior patterns and traits. Each child being different in age, personality, and behavioral makeup. I have used the services over the past ten years of my local shelter to help my children recognize these traits. Yet, despite recognition, the ghost still haunt us in many different ways. I believe children from marital violence live their life in denial. This denial permeates their very being and existence. It is hard to overcome!
    It is the intention of The Domestic Violence Series to raise funds for the cause, helping to support abuse shelters across the United States! These paintings have been made into a series of Limited Edition Prints which are available through your local shelter or by contacting THE DOMESTIC VIOLENCE SERIES by phone, mail or the internet. The original Oils will remain intact as a group for a period of two years as a traveling National Exhibit.
    The in-humanity that man is capable of showing to his own kind should never be ignored. My hope and desire is that this work will touch one soul (and hopefully many others) to help make this world a better place for man, woman and child.
    IT IS POSSIBLE TO PUT AN END TO DOMESTIC VIOLENCE! BREAK THE CYCLE!
Respectfully,

       MeloD